An 80-year-old man went to the doctor for a check-up and the doctor was amazed at what good shape the guy was in. The doctor asked, "To what do you attribute your good health?"

The old timer said, "I'm an R/C pilot and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up just after daylight and out chasing thermals up and down the mountains."

The doctor said, "Well, I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your dad when he died?"

The old timer said, "Who said my dad's dead?" The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your dad's still alive? How old is he?" The old timer said, "He's 100 years old and, in fact, he flew Zagis with me this morning, and that's why he's still alive, he's an R/C flyer."

The doctor said, "Well, that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it. How about your dad's dad? How old was he when he died?" The old timer said, "Who said my grandpa's dead?"

The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather's still living! How old is he?" The old timer said, "He's 118 years old." The doctor was getting frustrated at this point and said, "I guess he went flying with you this morning too?"

The old timer said, "No, Grandpa couldn't go this morning because he got married." The Doctor said in amazement, "Got married!! Why would a 118-year-old guy want to get married?" The old timer said, "Who said he wanted to?"

The know-it-all Modeler

A very knowledgeable modeler with a know-it-all arrogant attitude challenged club members that he could answer any model related questions. For a small $5 bet, he would go around and ask each member to ask one question. If he answered wrong, he would loose the bet. True to his words, he could answer all questions till finally no modelers would take up the challenge.

Always on the lookout for a new victim, one day the arrogant modeler came across a new novice member. "I challenge you that we will take a turn to ask model related questions" said the modeler, "But because you are a novice, if I can't answer your question, I'll pay you $100. But if you can't answer my question, you'll pay me $5".

The novice just wanted to get on with his flying and refused the bet. However, after repetitive, annoying words from the arrogant modeler, the novice just wanted him off his back so he accepted the bet.

The novice asked his question first... "What plane has 5 wings, 3 tails and 1 aileron, fitted with only an OS 28 and can go up to 250 km/h?"

After a long thought, the arrogant modeler concluded for the first time, he did not know the answer and paid the novice $100. "

So what's the plane called?" asked the arrogant modeler.

"I don't know" said the novice. He handed over the $5 and pocketed the remaining $95 for himself. Then he got on with his flying!

You might be an R/C modeler if...

• You are making an inverted low pass and then pull UP on the elevator
• You get to the field and realize your transmitter is still on charge at home
• You will go flying when it's 104 but you wont cut the grass for your wife cause" it's too hot out there"
• You buy a $600 mini lathe to make $5 airplane parts
• You can program a multifunction 9 channel computer radio but you can figure out your VCR
• You have a dog-eared Tower Hobbies catalog in your bathroom
• You spend $12.50 to get your wife some costume jewelry and $365 for r/c stuff and figure everything is even
• You consider a Sunday picnic a few hot dogs and some soda at the field
• Your wedding anniversary falls on the weekend of a fly in and you actually think about your choices
• You shop Toys-R-Us for pilots
• You have balls of dust on top of your living room furniture
• You have EVER glued your hands together with CA and have had to use an exacto knife in your teeth to cut them apart.
• You have built two right wings for a single winged plane
• You are shopping for land to build your dream home on and would rather have open pastureland than rolling wooded hills
• You have at least 3 planes in separate stages of completion
• You think R/C flying should be an Olympic event.
• You wear goggles and a silk scarf around your neck on the way to the field
• You have at least 10 T-shirts with airplanes on them
• You use more waxed paper building planes than your wife does baking
• You buy the "wife and kids" a new Pentium 3 computer for Christmas so you can practice with the Dave Brown flight simulator
• You introduce your wife as your co- pilot

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